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Politics

America’s #1 Bearer of Bear Political News

Life Politics 

Should Inclusive Restrooms Really Include Bears?

March 9, 2017February 7, 2017 Ivy Johnston 10 Comments bear rights, inclusive, progress, restrooms

Rancho Popantopalous, CA—It started when a local brown bear attempted to use the restroom at the Feldman Public Library in

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Politics World 

Trump’s Other Wall: Keeping Bears Out of America

March 2, 2017February 7, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 2 Comments Trump

If there is one thing about Trump that unites Americans, it’s his desire to keep all bears out of the

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Politics 

DeVos Confirmed, Immediately Distributes Free Bear Guns to Schools

February 7, 2017March 13, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 0 Comment Betsy DeVos

WASHINGTON—The US Senate has confirmed President Trump’s nominee for education secretary, Betsy DeVos. Vice-President Pence cast the tie-breaking vote to secure

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Politics 

Trump Briefed on Current Bear Situation, Chokes on French Fry

February 2, 2017February 5, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 0 Comment french fry, heimlich, Trump

Washington D.C.—President Trump met with leaders to be briefed on the high classified situation concerning bear attacks. While those details

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Life Nature Politics 

Heavily Armed School No Match For Grizzly Bears

January 31, 2017February 5, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 1 Comment Betsy DeVos, guns, school

Waptuk, WY—Hugh Glass Elementary School was attacked by bears today. Despite having enough guns to arm every student on campus,

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Faith Life Politics 

Holiday Demonstrators Discover War on Christmas Declared by Bears

December 20, 2016 Ethan Nicolle 1 Comment Christmas, protest, war

Protesters gathering to fight against the war on Christmas get second thoughts when they realize it was declared by bears

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Politics Science 

Bear Can’t Stop Laughing At Your Apocalyptic Election Posts On Social Media

November 7, 2016November 23, 2016 Ethan Nicolle 3 Comments apocalypse, election, politics, project ruxpin, Teddy

When biologists at the Ursine Research Institute hooked a bear’s mind up to the internet, they were met with endless belly

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Life Politics 

New Gun Laws Proposed to Curb Recent Minigun Bear Attacks

October 28, 2016April 18, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 5 Comments gatling gun, gun control, laws, minigun

With the rise in recent attacks by bears wandering around with miniguns implanted on their shoulders and firing at random,

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Politics 

The Bear Issues: Where do the Candidates Stand?

October 10, 2016November 24, 2016 Ethan Nicolle 1 Comment Clinton, comparison, election, Issues, Trump

At last night’s debate, Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump spent a lot of time attacking one another but polls show

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Politics 

Is the Clinton Big Honey Machine tied to Hillary’s Grizzly Allegiance?

September 28, 2016November 24, 2016 Ethan Nicolle 2 Comments big honey, Clinton, machine, ties

Critics of Hillary Clinton charge that she has close ties to bears, the enemies of man who do nothing but

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Joe Rogan Interviews 1,600 Pound Alaskan Grizzly Bear
Entertainment 

Joe Rogan Interviews 1,600 Pound Alaskan Grizzly Bear

May 25, 2019 Ethan Nicolle 4
Announcing The First Nonfiction Book Ever Made
Bear Attack Tips Entertainment 

Announcing The First Nonfiction Book Ever Made

March 30, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 2
Disney Announces Next Reboot Will Be “Real Pooh”
Entertainment 

Disney Announces Next Reboot Will Be “Real Pooh”

April 11, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 0
James Corden’s Wildest Carpool Karaoke Yet: Bears
Entertainment 

James Corden’s Wildest Carpool Karaoke Yet: Bears

January 19, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 1

Bear Attack Tips

The Book We Need Can Now Be Made
Bear Attack Tips Life World 

The Book We Need Can Now Be Made

May 18, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 0

Thanks to everybody who participated in my first Kickstarter campaign ever. It was a great success with funding at 250%

How to Avoid Common Bear Attacks
Bear Attack Tips 

How to Avoid Common Bear Attacks

April 20, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 0
Announcing The First Nonfiction Book Ever Made
Bear Attack Tips Entertainment 

Announcing The First Nonfiction Book Ever Made

March 30, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 2
BEAR ATTACKS: Know the Symptoms
Bear Attack Tips 

BEAR ATTACKS: Know the Symptoms

February 16, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 0
Amazing: Bear Learns To Skydive So He Can Elbow Drop Elk From Plane
Life Nature Sports 

Amazing: Bear Learns To Skydive So He Can Elbow Drop Elk From Plane

February 7, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 1
Mass Deforestation Proof Bears Fart in the Woods
Nature Science 

Mass Deforestation Proof Bears Fart in the Woods

June 27, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 1
Keep All Items Bear-Safe
Bear Attack Tips Nature 

Keep All Items Bear-Safe

June 20, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 0
Man Who Narrowly Escaped Bear Attack Dies of Pants Crapping
Health Nature 

Man Who Narrowly Escaped Bear Attack Dies of Pants Crapping

May 31, 2017 Ethan Nicolle 5
Grizzly Bear Shatters All Pro Wrestling Records After Identifying As Human
Life Sports 

Grizzly Bear Shatters All Pro Wrestling Records After Identifying As Human

March 1, 2019 Ethan Nicolle 0

The Babylon Bee has reported that a new pro-wrestler is taking the WWE by storm. The wrestler is a former

The Book We Need Can Now Be Made
Bear Attack Tips Life World 

The Book We Need Can Now Be Made

May 18, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 0
Amazing: Bear Learns To Skydive So He Can Elbow Drop Elk From Plane
Life Nature Sports 

Amazing: Bear Learns To Skydive So He Can Elbow Drop Elk From Plane

February 7, 2018 Ethan Nicolle 1
Should Inclusive Restrooms Really Include Bears?
Life Politics 

Should Inclusive Restrooms Really Include Bears?

March 9, 2017 Ivy Johnston 10
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